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A Step in Your Shadow
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Thank you God for the strength.And suddenly I find myself back to where I left. Selflessness. Oh blessedness. There’s the drive to keep myself once again. I’m deciding to take up more responsibilities this coming camp. I want to make sure that nothing goes wrong, and that everyone will have the best. I don’t have a need to do it to such extents, in fact, I may not even capable so but for one thing I know, I’m fighting for the camp. Just as well, I’m fighting for you. I want to do what you would have wanted be done if in my place. Since you wont be around, I will take the fort for you, looking to you as my role model.I’ve also found out an interaction between issues I didn’t realize had a bigger effect on me. I have felt inferior to you for quite long. You’ve always been more tactful, understanding, passionate, being able to reach the people, way more selfless, stronger, more known, more capable. Much of what I can do, you could as well, and make it better.And with my loss of confidence, both from low esteem, and due to my genuine lack of skills, I have become over reliant on you. Needing the assurance from you for everything I do. Always returning to you for consultation. I know you would want me to stand on my own and not fall on the shoulders of others, especially yours. Well, I’ve lived on with much of self-accreditation. Most of what I know comes from faith, but humanly, I’m weak and with no confidence of myself. Maybe I lack the affirmation from others. Touching a sore point brings me more negative response than positive regard, and hence I fend for myself through the times.Nonetheless, now that I know, I shall not let myself live in inferiority. Yea, I may feel that you’re still better than me, a notion I choose to determine as fact. But I am who I am, and I will do the best of the way I am. And that will I impact lives the way I most uniquely do so.Lol, it’s somewhat self-accreditation again, but there are people I know who are with me, people who believe in me, people who will support me. And if they believe in me, why should I not?Labels: frenz, God, Me, thoughts, zx
Darren Nico Pillai
Not-so-average teen, deep thinker, perfectionist with quirky randomness. Trained in the art of sarcasm and nonsensical logic.
Overcoming the circumstances of the present, and the issues of my past,
striving in self-betterment with a moral balance with the hope of the fulfillment of the destiny to be a light for Christ in His likeness,
spreading the love of God as how He first loved us
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Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me
Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am, for Your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity
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- Hosanna -
Philosophy:
I like to think about life, especially pursuing on the concept of love. Not that lovey dovey romantic kind, but the affections we have for one another
that ties us together,strangers, friends, besties, family, that's the love I wanna know about. Love is the essence of life that ties us together,
love is what we were made for and to be, love is embracing the gift of the relationship with GOD.
Find me at Facebook and Twitter
Leave a message on my tagboard or drop me some questions if any.
Collection of inspirations and reminders: Nico_thoughts@Twitter
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A Step in Your Shadow
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Thank you God for the strength.And suddenly I find myself back to where I left. Selflessness. Oh blessedness. There’s the drive to keep myself once again. I’m deciding to take up more responsibilities this coming camp. I want to make sure that nothing goes wrong, and that everyone will have the best. I don’t have a need to do it to such extents, in fact, I may not even capable so but for one thing I know, I’m fighting for the camp. Just as well, I’m fighting for you. I want to do what you would have wanted be done if in my place. Since you wont be around, I will take the fort for you, looking to you as my role model.I’ve also found out an interaction between issues I didn’t realize had a bigger effect on me. I have felt inferior to you for quite long. You’ve always been more tactful, understanding, passionate, being able to reach the people, way more selfless, stronger, more known, more capable. Much of what I can do, you could as well, and make it better.And with my loss of confidence, both from low esteem, and due to my genuine lack of skills, I have become over reliant on you. Needing the assurance from you for everything I do. Always returning to you for consultation. I know you would want me to stand on my own and not fall on the shoulders of others, especially yours. Well, I’ve lived on with much of self-accreditation. Most of what I know comes from faith, but humanly, I’m weak and with no confidence of myself. Maybe I lack the affirmation from others. Touching a sore point brings me more negative response than positive regard, and hence I fend for myself through the times.Nonetheless, now that I know, I shall not let myself live in inferiority. Yea, I may feel that you’re still better than me, a notion I choose to determine as fact. But I am who I am, and I will do the best of the way I am. And that will I impact lives the way I most uniquely do so.Lol, it’s somewhat self-accreditation again, but there are people I know who are with me, people who believe in me, people who will support me. And if they believe in me, why should I not?Labels: frenz, God, Me, thoughts, zx
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