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Chain Reaction
Friday, December 3, 2010
Heeeh, internet speed is awfully sluggish today.Suddenly things feel so meaningless. I think my time alone is often wasted either through idle gaming or mindless surfing of the net. Just that the thought is often evaded by all these zombie behaviour. Even through habitual intermittent periods, I randomly switch over to facebook, or locate a website in my head I could surf, only to realize I've done them all, I really don't have anything else to do.The only things I can think of that I do productively with my time is when I talk to friends, which isn't much, or when I pen down my thoughts.Since the web was down, kinda decided to talk to people. Not many people were online but nonetheless it made me felt pretty pathetic. Realize I ain't quite good at talking to people. Was thinking of anybody I could chat with but I figured much didn't know how to chat without it being too much scripted.I think even with people, I pretty much lack interpersonal skills to be able sustain simple conversations without relying on guides and a mental script format as to what to say next. Decide not to talk to anybody in the end except for 1 or 2 friends whom I've more or less practiced in holding conversations. And yet its funny someone ppl think me as someone sociable haha. It goes back to impersonality but nvm that. Maybe I'm dwelling too much into undue concerns of offending others, or a intrusion into space. I realize there's much I would like to know about one, but it often skips the primary step of small talk, which I greatly suck at. And then, I'm stuck at how to bring it up, how to talk.Sometimes, I look at him, and wonder how the hell he does it so well. Being able to forge bonds despite his introvertness, and through it, being able to tap unto this connections and do what he's great at doing.I wonder what I lack, the sociability in me. Not much good at relating to others, or perhaps it's my individualistic mindset that separates me from people. Sometimes I get so tired talking to people around me. Owells then, still working.===================================
I wonder...would it make a difference in how people see and understand me if they knew about my past ._.===================================
Woots. I'm doing great currently, keeping the momentum at one deed per day. =) Glad with all those done. The unseen chain reactions of one act leading to another, it's just so rewarding to see blessings take place in people's life and it hopping on to another, and then to another. The beauty and power of a single act goes a loooong looong way =)Oh, and heh, now been nicer and just affirming people randomly whenever I think of something nice or appreciated by them =) Why hold back, when simple words can brighten days and moods ^^ ===================================
An old secret reconstructed. Would three strikes count out? Glad it made a difference nonetheless. Boy are you retarded beyond belief. It feels like a superhero story xD ===================================
Am happy and amazed to see you on your feet. Keep it going. Love that smile on your face. I've been waiting for a moment like this, where you'll pick up and persevere. Will always be here if you ever need. Am proud of ya, stay strong and loving you still ^^===================================
One of these days Ima do a free questions day thing. Any questions asked. Pure honest replies ._. haha, I think it's fun and scary too =P Til then, or maybe a wish request for anybody to make any request lolol. wonder if anyone wud bother anyway xD===================================Are you today, able to say to yourself, for to any other, that you've lived life as how it was meant to be, fully accountable for every action, word, thought, both for that which needed be done, and those ought not to. For every moment in life, not wasting precious time to melancholic dwelling, for every gift, cherished, and with abundance, shared. For every choice, an oath to do right, rather for selfish purposes. And if not, how much then, are you doing it, and to what extend should you be partaking of it. Life, is a constant pursuit of righteousness, holiness, godliness. A perfection one might never see, yet incorporeally attainable in much paradoxical means. It ultimately isn't about fulfilling perfection, it's about embarking on it that makes it powerful, and with meaning.
Labels: frenz, love, thoughts
Darren Nico Pillai
Not-so-average teen, deep thinker, perfectionist with quirky randomness. Trained in the art of sarcasm and nonsensical logic.
Overcoming the circumstances of the present, and the issues of my past,
striving in self-betterment with a moral balance with the hope of the fulfillment of the destiny to be a light for Christ in His likeness,
spreading the love of God as how He first loved us
==============================================================
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me
Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am, for Your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
- Hosanna -
Philosophy:
I like to think about life, especially pursuing on the concept of love. Not that lovey dovey romantic kind, but the affections we have for one another
that ties us together,strangers, friends, besties, family, that's the love I wanna know about. Love is the essence of life that ties us together,
love is what we were made for and to be, love is embracing the gift of the relationship with GOD.
Find me at Facebook and Twitter
Leave a message on my tagboard or drop me some questions if any.
Collection of inspirations and reminders: Nico_thoughts@Twitter
==============================================================
Chain Reaction
Friday, December 3, 2010
Heeeh, internet speed is awfully sluggish today.Suddenly things feel so meaningless. I think my time alone is often wasted either through idle gaming or mindless surfing of the net. Just that the thought is often evaded by all these zombie behaviour. Even through habitual intermittent periods, I randomly switch over to facebook, or locate a website in my head I could surf, only to realize I've done them all, I really don't have anything else to do.The only things I can think of that I do productively with my time is when I talk to friends, which isn't much, or when I pen down my thoughts.Since the web was down, kinda decided to talk to people. Not many people were online but nonetheless it made me felt pretty pathetic. Realize I ain't quite good at talking to people. Was thinking of anybody I could chat with but I figured much didn't know how to chat without it being too much scripted.I think even with people, I pretty much lack interpersonal skills to be able sustain simple conversations without relying on guides and a mental script format as to what to say next. Decide not to talk to anybody in the end except for 1 or 2 friends whom I've more or less practiced in holding conversations. And yet its funny someone ppl think me as someone sociable haha. It goes back to impersonality but nvm that. Maybe I'm dwelling too much into undue concerns of offending others, or a intrusion into space. I realize there's much I would like to know about one, but it often skips the primary step of small talk, which I greatly suck at. And then, I'm stuck at how to bring it up, how to talk.Sometimes, I look at him, and wonder how the hell he does it so well. Being able to forge bonds despite his introvertness, and through it, being able to tap unto this connections and do what he's great at doing.I wonder what I lack, the sociability in me. Not much good at relating to others, or perhaps it's my individualistic mindset that separates me from people. Sometimes I get so tired talking to people around me. Owells then, still working.===================================
I wonder...would it make a difference in how people see and understand me if they knew about my past ._.===================================
Woots. I'm doing great currently, keeping the momentum at one deed per day. =) Glad with all those done. The unseen chain reactions of one act leading to another, it's just so rewarding to see blessings take place in people's life and it hopping on to another, and then to another. The beauty and power of a single act goes a loooong looong way =)Oh, and heh, now been nicer and just affirming people randomly whenever I think of something nice or appreciated by them =) Why hold back, when simple words can brighten days and moods ^^ ===================================
An old secret reconstructed. Would three strikes count out? Glad it made a difference nonetheless. Boy are you retarded beyond belief. It feels like a superhero story xD ===================================
Am happy and amazed to see you on your feet. Keep it going. Love that smile on your face. I've been waiting for a moment like this, where you'll pick up and persevere. Will always be here if you ever need. Am proud of ya, stay strong and loving you still ^^===================================
One of these days Ima do a free questions day thing. Any questions asked. Pure honest replies ._. haha, I think it's fun and scary too =P Til then, or maybe a wish request for anybody to make any request lolol. wonder if anyone wud bother anyway xD===================================Are you today, able to say to yourself, for to any other, that you've lived life as how it was meant to be, fully accountable for every action, word, thought, both for that which needed be done, and those ought not to. For every moment in life, not wasting precious time to melancholic dwelling, for every gift, cherished, and with abundance, shared. For every choice, an oath to do right, rather for selfish purposes. And if not, how much then, are you doing it, and to what extend should you be partaking of it. Life, is a constant pursuit of righteousness, holiness, godliness. A perfection one might never see, yet incorporeally attainable in much paradoxical means. It ultimately isn't about fulfilling perfection, it's about embarking on it that makes it powerful, and with meaning.
Labels: frenz, love, thoughts
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