"Stuck between the past, present and future."

It's like life became void of time. While the seconds tick away, my soul lingers in an ethereal space. I'm trying to find my way out, but the emptiness sucks me right back. Everyday I run from the loneliness by entering a state 'brainlessness'. So much I can do, and should do, yet never, remaining hooked on the numbing escape.

Anyway, this is meant to be a reflective entry. Been doing a lot of questioning, challenging my motives, my values, my goals. I think I'm way more selfish than I really am, or that maybe I do things merely to get good reports. I mean a person's true character is what's on the inside right, and when I look in I see someone who cares for himself more than others, someone self-centered and egoistic. Sacrifices made are ultimately to my benefit. When in times of other's need, I'm not fully, or sincerely there. And then I also do seemingly good things for self-glorification.

I wonder to myself, do I have love in me? Do I truly love anyone? Who exactly am am I doing this for? What kind of person am I really...?

Labels: life, thoughts

"Stuck between the past, present and future."

It's like life became void of time. While the seconds tick away, my soul lingers in an ethereal space. I'm trying to find my way out, but the emptiness sucks me right back. Everyday I run from the loneliness by entering a state 'brainlessness'. So much I can do, and should do, yet never, remaining hooked on the numbing escape.

Anyway, this is meant to be a reflective entry. Been doing a lot of questioning, challenging my motives, my values, my goals. I think I'm way more selfish than I really am, or that maybe I do things merely to get good reports. I mean a person's true character is what's on the inside right, and when I look in I see someone who cares for himself more than others, someone self-centered and egoistic. Sacrifices made are ultimately to my benefit. When in times of other's need, I'm not fully, or sincerely there. And then I also do seemingly good things for self-glorification.

I wonder to myself, do I have love in me? Do I truly love anyone? Who exactly am am I doing this for? What kind of person am I really...?

Labels: life, thoughts