|
profile
journal
archives
others
follow+
|
The thinnest thread
Monday, August 29, 2011
It was the second read it that stopped me in my tracks.
And I'm asking myself, has it reached to such an extent. Of hatred, of malice. Its cruel. Not sure if I should be angry or be sorry. The anger tempts me to play my better half of the game, but nothing good's gonna work out if I did that. I assure you if you intended for it, it will be there, but not because you made me feel this way, but because I chose to face my failures.
Do I even have a right to be angry in the first place. After all it is me that have caused you these much hurts. The constant neglect and other missing puzzles. Taking you for granted as the better man. Forgetting you when times are better, making you less of a priority. The pain would be beyond tolerance.
But no, not a toy. Never were a toy, whatever it was. You should know how much she means to me, yet I am unable to make her feel so. And similarly, i probably wont be able to make you feel it either. It doesn't help that my pathetic life cant prove your values to me. Nothing I do helps and I don't know what else to do. It seems that my efforts are trivial, definitely means no more in my eyes yours are than mine is to you. Sorry I'm too pathetic, I cant even make a simple friendship work out for you no matter how I try. I'll just do what I can, somehow.
You shouldn't expect anything out of me, cause there's nothing inside. Sometimes, I cant face you because I know I wont be able to fulfill what you want it to be. You don't deserve some like me anyway, someone unable to reciprocate your friendship. Guess i'm not cut out for it. It's your call. Pull the chute if you cant go on. I wont blame you.
Just a thin line away from losing all the trust,
but I'll keep it there just for the benefit of doubt.
Labels: frenz, zx
Darren Nico Pillai
Not-so-average teen, deep thinker, perfectionist with quirky randomness. Trained in the art of sarcasm and nonsensical logic.
Overcoming the circumstances of the present, and the issues of my past,
striving in self-betterment with a moral balance with the hope of the fulfillment of the destiny to be a light for Christ in His likeness,
spreading the love of God as how He first loved us
==============================================================
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me
Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am, for Your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
- Hosanna -
Philosophy:
I like to think about life, especially pursuing on the concept of love. Not that lovey dovey romantic kind, but the affections we have for one another
that ties us together,strangers, friends, besties, family, that's the love I wanna know about. Love is the essence of life that ties us together,
love is what we were made for and to be, love is embracing the gift of the relationship with GOD.
Find me at Facebook and Twitter
Leave a message on my tagboard or drop me some questions if any.
Collection of inspirations and reminders: Nico_thoughts@Twitter
==============================================================
The thinnest thread
Monday, August 29, 2011
It was the second read it that stopped me in my tracks.
And I'm asking myself, has it reached to such an extent. Of hatred, of malice. Its cruel. Not sure if I should be angry or be sorry. The anger tempts me to play my better half of the game, but nothing good's gonna work out if I did that. I assure you if you intended for it, it will be there, but not because you made me feel this way, but because I chose to face my failures.
Do I even have a right to be angry in the first place. After all it is me that have caused you these much hurts. The constant neglect and other missing puzzles. Taking you for granted as the better man. Forgetting you when times are better, making you less of a priority. The pain would be beyond tolerance.
But no, not a toy. Never were a toy, whatever it was. You should know how much she means to me, yet I am unable to make her feel so. And similarly, i probably wont be able to make you feel it either. It doesn't help that my pathetic life cant prove your values to me. Nothing I do helps and I don't know what else to do. It seems that my efforts are trivial, definitely means no more in my eyes yours are than mine is to you. Sorry I'm too pathetic, I cant even make a simple friendship work out for you no matter how I try. I'll just do what I can, somehow.
You shouldn't expect anything out of me, cause there's nothing inside. Sometimes, I cant face you because I know I wont be able to fulfill what you want it to be. You don't deserve some like me anyway, someone unable to reciprocate your friendship. Guess i'm not cut out for it. It's your call. Pull the chute if you cant go on. I wont blame you.
Just a thin line away from losing all the trust,
but I'll keep it there just for the benefit of doubt.
Labels: frenz, zx
|
